Sometimes business inspirations can fall out of the sky. Recently, everything I have been privy to in a business sense is telling me that stories are what resonate most with consumers.  Why stories? Because nothing illustrates a point better than an example of what you’re talking about.

If you really think about it, the most effective TV commercials are stories.  My God — how many people are riveted on the many story lines being woven in PBS’ Downton Abbey?  The most riveting articles you read contain stories. Religions reach people through parables, (stories) – whether they were crafted to help the reader understand a point or they were real life tales that inspire readers to take action. The most engaging public speakers hold their audiences spellbound through storytelling to make their most salient points.

This reminded me of my days as a real estate trainer, when I used story after personal story about my own experiences in new home sales to illustrate whatever part of my class’s training was supposed to take place that day.  The moment I began to tell a story, I found myself relaxing. Funny thing is, my students could sense it too.  And when your audience sees and hears you “owning” a moment, they can easily join you there. The key to making storytelling work for business, however, is learning to tie the story to something important you are trying to communicate.

A business speaking presentation I did last year was my reminder that stories rule.  I had been speaking in front of a group of about 100 people for a while, fairly certain I was being heard by my audience, but not at all confident I was a hit. The topic: the importance of a well-written online profile.  Everyone has to have one, and many small business people can’t hire a PR firm to do it, so I often give away some of my freelance writing secrets. And since we are all represented both online and in print by our bios or profiles, I knew it was a topic of interest.  I could tell my audience was interested, but I knew I could do better.

So instead of giving attendees all the writing tips I had planned to give them, I abandoned my tutorial tone and opted for storytelling. I told them a story about my non-college-educated daughter, who built an empire by making her eCommerce company sound larger than life — how she never sold herself short, how she constantly used the word “we” instead of “I” and how, when she got up on a stage with pedigreed, educated entrepreneurs  holding charts and spouting statistics, her biggest piece of advice was to “fake it ‘till you make it.” .

Think about why we gravitate toward sites like Yelp.com or TripAdvisor before we make important spending decisions.  We go there to read stories about other people’s experiences.  How do we learn, as children, to behave? Our parents tell us stories about themselves or others that show us that we don’t have to make every mistake in the book in order to learn something (even though some of us do have to learn the hard way).

At one point I began to realize that I had been a storyteller all my life, whether it was in school when I was called upon to write an essay, as a salesperson trying to close a sale, or as a parent, trying to teach my daughter about what to expect as she reached adulthood.  We are all storytellers, but some of us don’t always embrace that part of our character. Like anything else, storytelling takes practice.

Once you learn to use this effective way to communicate with, soft-sell to, and engage your clientele and business associates, you will see heads nod, eyes open wide and people hanging around you as if they never really knew you before. Stories seem to bind us, making us realize that we are all in this together, and that we can learn from other people’s successes and failures.

We need the power of storytelling to gain trust, rapport and authenticity, so above all, make your intent to use it a genuine one –because people can see right through a sham artist.

I know this because what I just wrote here was – a story.

Then came the answering machine.  The ringing sound became limited to just a few repetitions and not answering the phone was no longer considered rude because  “screening” calls suddenly became acceptable. If the caller suspected you of being home, however, you might hear them squawking, “If you’re there, pick up,” making you feel like a heel.

Phone company voicemail freed you up even more, giving the caller options and permitting him or her a longer time-frame to leave one of those “detailed messages” some people don’t like to leave because they’d rather speak with you in person and others DO like to leave so they’ll never have to talk to you at all.

As for written communications, up until email caught on, business letters were still tapped out on IBM Selectrics or fancy word processors, printed up and sent snail mail. Business letters still were, however, considered “impersonal” as compared to picking up the phone.  Emails were meant for cursory messages at first, then they became the norm. And texting? Don’t get me started.

All of this makes me realize about how much people deem acceptable as communication has changed since my college days. So much so that when I see someone getting frantic over a slow download on their phones or freaking out over having to actually talk to someone on the phone instead of leaving a voicemail, I just want to laugh out loud.

Because I write for Forbes five times per month, I felt I had to address this at least once, in a blog titled Choosing Communication Methods Wisely for Your Small Business.  But I didn’t get to rant about much because Forbes might think I was a whiner and not a serious professional blogger.  So I had to ask myself:  what do I miss about how communications used to be?  I can wax nostalgic about how voicemail, email and texting moves things through space more quickly than I ever thought possible, but I can also admit that I like getting responses and closure on communications faster rather than slower.

I can say I miss talking on the phone but — truth be told — I prefer emails to phone calls because I can get so much more accomplished with a few sentences than I can over the phone, where I feel the obligation to ask about the state of someone’s business, family, health, etc., before telling them the reason for my call.  I know, I know. I shouldn’t complain about etiquette, but I am such a results-oriented-chick-on-a-deadline I sometimes have to remember to be social.

While I guess I can’t complain, in so many ways I miss the pace of life when I was younger. Phones rang until you answered them and letters arrived in mailboxes for you to rip open. There wasn’t much in between, and you didn’t know any better.  I guess that’s like saying I miss the simplicity of the ‘60s when in reality, those years were rife with racial discrimination and the Vietnam war.   We just didn’t know how it would all play out.

So I have to look at it this way:  If the simplicity of those days were still the norm, you wouldn’t be reading this blog, which I so love to write.  And I suppose I’d just have to rest my case.

I have come to realize from the onset of this project that a major remodel begins with familiarity, attraction, and respect, just like a relationship. It took us time to become familiar with our new lives in this house, as we formed an appreciation for the space we are about to transform and fostered a respect for one another’s tastes. Now we are about to dive into territory that often wreaks havoc with a lot of couples’ relationships.

Why such drama? Because what is in the offing isn’t a cosmetic treatment to a 1996 kitchen that screams “outdated” from every angle. It’s our own, very personal reality show, where decisions will have to be made that we’ll be doomed or thrilled to live with for another 15-20 years. And since we are no spring chickens, this is the last kitchen remodel we will probably ever do in our lifetimes, which makes the “resale” aspect of it for the next generation important as well.

Having spent most of my career writing about real estate and construction for newspapers, magazines and web sites, I have a dangerous knowledge of what is about to ensue. I’ve thrown countless articles and blogs on design, structure, building materials, appliances, and returns on investment out there for all to digest all surmising I might someday be considered an expert on these topics.  What I didn’t anticipate, however, is how difficult it might be to make decisions about all these things in real life and in real time with another person.

George and I are both concerned with aesthetics, his being more traditional and mine being more contemporary. And while we both can cook, he is the master chef while I happily take “B” actor status. So we decided to compromise.  George will get choose the appliances and I will have more input on how it will all look from afar. So far, so good.

But what will it be like when we finally do all the legwork and I have to pack up box after box of dishes, pots and pans, move the fridge out to the garage until it is replaced by a sleeker working model, and the area that used to be my kitchen is laid waste?  Will we have regrets and make changes along the way we could not envision right now? God, I hope not.  But if you follow my blogs, you’ll be the fly on the wall, just as I am when watching an HGTV remodeling reality show, except there will be no annoying commercials.

So will you come along for the ride? I can’t promise the road will be a smooth one, but I can promise you’ll get a “piece of my mind” as we travel this path to my kitchen Valhalla.  And once it’s done, don’t be surprised if you see a picture of me setting up a cot next to my new kitchen island so I can wake up to my gleaming new dream-come-true.

Just don’t draw up the commitment papers, please.

Being on hand for the run-up, execution and aftermath of my husband’s shoulder replacement surgery heralds one of those moments he fears.  I can only imagine how the spouses of writers who blog or write about daily life have a nagging undercurrent in the backs of their heads – “What will prompt the love of my life to include me in something she writes?  Will our private life ever be completely private?”

Fate gives me no choice. I have to write about it.

It started with an injury at work — the kind of physical feat a guy in his 50s thinks is perfectly okay because men (unlike women) don’t really notice how their bodies have changed past a certain age.  He threw a fire engine hose to another fireman before his shoulder and brain were prepared for it.

After his doctors found no alternative to making his shoulder bionic, my analytical (yes, he loves the reality show How Things are Made…) firefighter husband engaged in much study, anticipation and curiosity during the months preceding the replacement of one of his most flexible and complex joints. Once he was put off-duty and the lengthy process of getting approvals from all the entities whose bureaucracies define the words “red tape” began, there was plenty of (too much) time to Google himself blue on the topic of shoulder replacements.  This included finding YouTube videos of the operation being performed by the very surgeon who would be doing his.  One peek into his home office during these viewings was enough to ruin my appetite, so I learned to stay away.

Scheduled to happen at a huge San Francisco hospital only a few days before Christmas, the surgery date forced us to get a lot done ahead of time. Anything we did was strategically planned in anticipation of both of us being activity-limited for a good chunk of time. Decorations went up earlier than usual. Gifts were efficiently purchased, wrapped and shipped before our lives were to change.  And what didn’t get done went by the wayside for the first time in our lives.  As December 19^th approached, we basked in doing a number of “lasts” – the last movie theater visit for awhile; the last dinner out for awhile; the last time we’d be able to hold each other very close in our king-sized bed – and the list went on and on.

Of course, it wasn’t the surgery itself that had me spooked. It was fear of the unknown when any loved one goes “under” to get surgery performed.  It took me decades of life-experience and revelations to find my soul mate and the terror of something unexpected happening gripped me constantly.

The night before the surgery we took a hospital-close hotel room in Japan Town in order to permit ourselves some sleep before a 6 am hospital check-in and to enable me to use a convenient hospital shuttle service during the two days he was to be there. Needless to say, slumber did not befall us during a restless night of anticipation, but it did give me a place to leave all my personal effects for a few days.

By 6 am the next morning we are doing protocols at the hospital’s ambulatory care unit and half an hour later, a close friend of ours arrives to keep us company and to see the big guy off as he gets wheeled into surgery. I should re-classify her at this point. She is now permanent family. No one but a hospital employee, spouse, parent or sibling crosses the Golden Gate Bridge that early in the morning for this purpose.

Shedding his civvies and donning the garb that would find him having to cover his behind for the next few days, my husband bravely waves goodbye surrounded by nurses and loved ones.  We make our way down to the huge hospital lobby to wait out the three hours it would take to knock him out, replace the inner workings of his shoulder with metal and plastic and see him out of recovery. I am given a pager and am told the surgeon would find me once the ordeal is finished.

In the meantime, I am on my game. Aside from my demand to be able to spend the first night in his hospital room, we had received pledges from an inordinate number of family and friends (including half his firehouse) that he would be graced with visitors. So it’s now time to earnestly make my case for a private room. Having phoned the “bed control” guy at the hospital the night before, I make it plain to the intake department personnel in the lobby that since he is a public employee there on a job-related injury, my husband is unlikely to qualify for a room by himself. So please-please-pretty-please could they find it in their hearts to place one of San Francisco’s finest in a room that might NOT get a second occupant for a night? They smiled and said they would put it on the nurses’ agenda.

And so the waiting began.  Armed with a decent cup of coffee, my sister-in-arms and I take up residence in the corner of the waiting room without a blaring TV screen, produce iPads from our lady-like bags and begin answering emails, chatting about life in between tapping screens.  Soon another good friend appears – a salt-of-the-earth fireman who adores my husband and who now works in the department’s stress unit.  His calm, reassuring voice and his engaging stories of my hero warm my heart and bring my blood pressure down.

By about two hours into the wait, the assisting orthopedic surgeon finds me in the lobby to say that all went well.  As surgeons usually do, he boasts of the doctors’ combined prowess, dubbing the surgery “textbook.”  I am thrilled, relieved, prayerful and brain-dead by then, aside from having been sleep-deprived. Now we must wait until the patient is out of recovery and being rolled into a hospital room, which happens about an hour later.

With his hospital room number in my hot little hand, I hightail it up to the fifth floor, following signs and practically tripping over hallway-parked gurneys. And there, in a corner room with a magnificent view of San Francisco, is my life’s partner, hooked up to tubes with bottles hanging overhead, in a perfectly private room, grinning broadly.

The rest of his hospital stay is nothing short of magnificent. Although my rollaway bed is less than hotel-like and my sleep is shallow, nurses enter the room stealthily that night, flashlights in hand, trying to make little disturbance while giving the patient his meds around the clock.  By the next morning my sister-in-law arrives, giving me leave to head to the hotel room, where I close the light-blocking shoji screens across the window and fall face down on the bed, no doubt drooling onto the clean sheets as a druggy sleep overtakes me.

We have been home for about ten days now and my guy is an amazingly good patient. As he adjusts daily to the regimen of medications to stay ahead of any discomfort, he is mindful of the sling-free passive exercises he is required to do five times per day, careful not to engage any shoulder muscles as they heal around foreign parts. Apart from pharmacy runs, take out food and receiving visitors, we are realistic about what a one-armed man can do. We joke constantly about how I have to help him get dressed, pulling his sweat bottoms so high he looks like a character out of an old sit-com; how, despite prune juice and a number of medicinal remedies, because of all the drugs he is taking he can’t remember when he last had a successful visit to the porcelain throne, and how wonderful it will be to start doing all the things his injured shoulder prevented him from doing for so long.

Laughter is nearly always the order of the day around here as we deal with slings, healing naps, therapy, meds, old TV shows and streaming video. I can only hope that when illness or injury befalls me, I am as good-natured about it as he is, and that I am surrounded by as much love and encouragement.

But most of all, because life is so fragile, capable of changing on a dime, I am thankful I can write this at this moment with a smile on my face. Our gifts for 2013 include a new body part and, of course, one another.

Okay. I‘ll admit it now. This election cycle really got to me. Trying to remain apolitical to my clients and friends is not an easy thing to do; keeping my liberal-leaning self from joining the discourse in Facebook threads, not hitting the “like” button when I agreed with something, failing to make my feelings known –it was all tough on me this time around. So I guess it’s finally time to let it all out, knowing I risk losing some good will among those who may disagree

And while the logic of political leanings has often escaped me, was this because I never tried to analyze it before, or was it this particular presidential election that seemed to represent such broad disparities in what I thought what America was supposed to be about?

As I drove my car to an errand the other day, my mind began to default to the things I think many people have taken for granted in recent years, yet in years past might have admitted were “good” for us when they were made possible. The road I used and beautiful bridge I drove across were paid for by tax dollars, both local and federal. The air was clean, clear enough to see the white-tipped Sierra Nevadas from my car window, because automobile emission standards had evolved since the days smog hung over them. The food I picked up had been cleared by the FDA to be safe enough to eat and the restaurant inspected by authorities to be clean. The buildings I passed had access for wheelchairs, making them available for all tax-paying citizens to partake of their services. And I was listening to public radio, where thought-provoking issues rarely brought up by the mainstream media are addressed and told in nearly storybook prose, making me understand them so much more clearly.

Then it gets personal. Because he has put himself in harm’s way over and over again, my firefighter husband is home on a medical leave, preparing to have a body part replaced because he was injured on the job – all paid for by taxes. And because of his union and hundreds of others like his who fought for these rights, he is able to continue to collect his pay and look forward to physical therapy that will restore him to a pain-free existence. Just a few years ago, however, he was able to take advantage of the Family and Medical Leave Act to help care for his ailing mother, who needed 24/7 supervision. Many, many people fought to stop these kinds of benefits from being created, but a belief in the common good won out in the end.

To top that off, I watched as my non-college educated daughter took a concept and grew it into a company that became featured on the pages of important magazines and big city newspapers, putting nearly 200 people to work in a five-year period, while everyone around her said she would fail. How did she do it? “I never saw anyone in my family work for a paycheck,” she told the press. “My grandparents were all business owners. So working in some low-paying job my entire life just wasn’t going to cut it.” Did she build that business all on her own? Yes, but it was also made possible by those who came before her and by the blessings of a country that, in the end, rewards those who think outside the box.

If life is so much like a football game, then its truisms still apply. We’re all in this together. If our country is now becoming increasingly defined by the minorities who have fought tooth and nail to be seen, heard, and treated as equals, then working with them and not against them makes us one big team. Finding solutions together, where everyone can realize the blessings of the American Dream, should be our goal. And extra points are won when we find consensus on the rocky road to a better America. But if we don’t want to become a third world country who ignores the poor, then caring for the least among us is still a duty, as we look for ways to help them break through generational barriers that unfortunately still exist.

For anyone to do a dance in the end zone right now won’t solve a thing. But for everyone to look at a vision of the future as a shared dream, we can grow better as a people and set an example many nations can use to pull themselves up as well.

I don’t believe we are good because we are Americans. I believe we are Americans because we are basically good. And as this year draws to an end, my wish is that the lessons we learned during this election help us grow and change, bringing us all closer instead of dividing us more. Why? Because being an American, to me, will always mean my glass is perennially half-full at a minimum. It’s why both sides of my Greek family came here on crowded ships and waved American flags the day they were sworn in as citizens. They knew this was a place where anything was possible; that the language you spoke, the God you believed in, the color of your skin and the education you possessed were not as important as the commitment you had to make a better life for yourself and your family. It was true then and it is true now. May the promise of this dream still burn within all of us, and may we look forward to a year of hope, happiness and fulfillment of all those things we hold dear.

I am a practical person who tries to be direct in what I express – not often terribly philosophical in my writing or perhaps I might have written a bunch of self-help books by now.

But the spirit has moved me to ask the question:  why do we constantly sell ourselves short?  Is it part of human nature to fear that we may be inadequate when presented with a golden opportunity?

Fact is, I am one of those whacko individuals who looks forward to change and does her best work when challenged. So when I put feelers out about doing a job that seems way over my head, I chuckle to myself, saying, “Hmm. If I had never put myself out there, I’d never have gotten a shot at it. And if I do get it, it will be a frickin’ miracle.”   My “throw-it-against-the-wall-and-see-if-it-sticks” attitude has resulted in a number of interesting experiences strewn along my life’s path. And even if my resume now looks like a patchwork quilt, I have never regretted taking on something interesting and different.

Once in a while you do get what you wish for, a task or assignment poised to test your mettle in ways you never thought possible.  Inevitably (if you’re like me) questions of self-doubt can begin swirling in your head.  How have other people managed to succeed at doing what you are about to do?  Did they have some magical formula you simply don’t possess?  Did they manage to put their blue jeans on differently than you do? Are their credentials better, do they have more expertise than you do, or were they feeling just as scared as you are now but never told a soul about it?

It just so happened that someone somewhere became convinced that you were up to the task, slid a big fat hunk of perfectly clear ice your way and asked you to make a beautiful sculpture.  And if one person thinks you can make art out of it, then the possibility exists others might throw some ice your way too.  So you have to ask yourself – do you believe in your own abilities as readily as someone else does?

It all comes down to this: now that you’ve got this wonderful opportunity, what will you do?  Will you shrink from it, citing you may not have the proper tools to make a killer sculpture?  Or will you step up and “behave as if” you are the rock star everyone expects you to be?

My advice: send those ice shavings flying — because if you don’t do it, someone else will.  And where will that leave you?

(The writer of this blog thanks you for your willingness to be her therapist for a few moments.  After all, life is about so much more than news, weather and sports…)

When people ask me what I do for a living, I simply respond that I am a freelance writer.  I then stand back and watch faces gloss over with expressions that range from confusion to curiosity.

Over the past few years, small business people have been coming to grips with the idea that the words they use to describe themselves, their skill sets or their businesses are not only important – they are vital to how clients and potential customers view them – especially in the infinite online world, where articles, quotes, videos and content can live on forever.  For that reason, many are turning to professional copywriters, usually freelancers, to write colorful, accurate copy about them to reflect their expertise in professional-sounding terms.

Freelance writers (writers for hire) are creative types, but they are also business people, whose livelihoods depend on referrals gleaned from the good will of past clients.  Few of them hang shingles. None I know do any advertising.  Instead, they are those men and women backstage you’re just not supposed to bring much attention to, which suits them just fine.

If you are considering hiring a freelance writer for the first time, it may be wise to prepare yourself for this unique relationship.  Your writer will usually meet with you in person or set up a time to chat by phone, discuss your needs, show you samples of his or her work and interview you to get a full picture of what is to be written.  Like an architect creating a design, he or she works using a process; usually a first draft is written after which you will be asked to suggest edits. One or even two more drafts may take place until you are pleased with the result. Be sure you have the time to read these carefully, but don’t take so long that the process becomes tedious.  Your writer will clear up any misstatements, ambiguities and add to or subtract from the word count according to the space constraints and the “punch factor” – sometimes short and concise has more impact.

Some writers charge a fee up front for their services; others bill the entire fee upon completion of the work.  Some charge by the word, others by the hour, and others by proposing a flat fee for an entire project and often they figure out which arrangement will work by the nature of the assignment.   Occasionally, a large project requires a monthly retainer, since the work will be ongoing for a particular client.

Apart from being word experts, freelancers are not unlike any other independent contractor, however.  They take on jobs in good faith, expect timely communications and feedback, and hope to complete the work you ordered by a certain date.  Most don’t collect regular paychecks unless they have a number of steady retainer clients.  They live under the risk, like any independent consultant, that those regular checks may disappear at any time, forcing them to continuously look for new clients even if their plate is already full.

A good freelancer will be honest about whether or not (1) an assignment can realistically be completed within your timeframe and (2) the subject matter for which you are requesting copy is something not in his or her repertoire.  The latter comes into play when a copywriter may not be versed in (for instance) highly technical topics, grant-writing or corporate white papers. But he or she may be great at producing copy such as newsletters, blogs, web site content, executive profiles, and video scripting.

Freelance writers are basically storytellers who want nothing more than to tell the story you want to see out there about you or your company in an articulate, caring way. That’s why it is incumbent upon you to ask a lot of questions before you hire one and then commit to working through the process in order to get the kind of product you seek.

Web site designers can often refer you to a reputable freelance writer, since most have a few they use consistently when taking on a project.  If you have the time for it, one of the best ways to find one is to look online at what is already out there.  Well-written professional bios, for example, can be found on many corporate web sites, and white papers, newsletters and blogs can be found among the pages of financial planners, attorneys, real estate agents and other professionals. Look for several that reflect the kind of tone and wording you admire. Then either try to find out who wrote it or bring a copy of it along as an example for the person you eventually hire.

Once you see how a professional copywriter works magic, saying things you’d want to say about you or your business if you had the time, patience and focus to say them in the best possible way, it’s not a stretch to say you just might get hooked, using that copywriter every time a marketing-oriented writing need occurs.  But if your budget does not have room to hire someone, imitation is always the sincerest form of flattery.

No, I am not talking about plagiarism.  When you go online to find examples of what you are trying to create – a bio of yourself, for instance – pay attention to the structure that is used. Is it written in first person or third?  Does the writer begin with the person’s name or does he or she lead into a story about the person?  How short is the first paragraph and how punchy is the first line?  How many words are there – is it short and sweet, or long and rather tedious?  You can learn a lot about how to write something by studying the make-ups of both well-written and really badly written copy.

If you do decide to delegate this important part of your marketing efforts, consider it part of your overall business strategy.  Behind most ad campaigns, Podcast scripts, award-winning applications, mission statements and even well-written Craigslist ads is a professional writer, sitting somewhere in his or her sweats, making edit after edit to finely tune a client’s message.  Give us a call.

How often have you asked your hair stylist, massage therapist or aesthetician just who does their hair, gives them a massage or makes their skin look so good?  In most cases, they each know someone with whom they trade services.

Bartering is as old as the Ancient Agora of Athens, when currency took many forms. Few business people talk about it, since it feels like such a secretive under-the counter practice – not even something many of us will admit we do.  In today’s economy, however, it is quietly being practiced as a way for small business people to “scratch each others’ backs” using their time instead of their pocketbooks to get their needs met either personally or professionally. An example of this would be trades for a chiropractor to adjust the vertebrae of a web designer, a social media expert and a content provider (like yours truly) on an ongoing basis to handle all of his or her online marketing efforts, freeing up the chiropractor’s time to do what he or she does best while attracting new clients using one professional in each of his or her respective industries.

Never done a trade or even thought of doing one?  Barter certainly has its uses.

If you are an independent contractor who provides a service, you no doubt have already set a price on what you do.  There is the cost of doing it (your time and materials), the fee you would charge for your services on the open market, and then there is the value you would put on trading it for something you might never have had the luxury of having or having done.  When I look at the last option, I find most of the people with whom I trade services prefer not to quantify the dollars we are giving away, instead focusing on how much intrinsic value that other service offers us.  Value (like beauty) is, after all, in the eye of the beholder.

The warning I would offer here is one of moderation, however.  While barter is a great way of enjoying a service that you might otherwise deem a luxury or even a necessity potentially creating raving fans and getting referrals down the road, it won’t put food on the table or pay your mortgage.  Don’t get caught up in so many trades that your time and finances are severely compromised. I judge whether I want to take on a trade by (1) if it’s something I’ve always dreamed of doing or having done on a regular basis (2) if I have come to know and trust the service provider through friendship, business networking or reputation, having already seen samples or evidence of his or her work (3) limiting barter clients to a certain aspect of my life – in my case (and at my age), health and beauty, and  (4) if doing a service for that potential trade partner robs me of too much precious money-making time.

You may want to test the waters with a potential trade client, but if you go this route, be sure to make it one or two service-to-service swaps with specific timelines and services in mind.  The most troubling types of swaps are the kind where one of the two parties is giving of themselves and the other hasn’t reciprocated in kind. I have had trades that have haunted me for more than a year merely because the person giving me services says he or she will take me up on my half of the bargain at a later date. This can cause sleepless nights and what I call “trade guilt” – forcing me to repeatedly ask them what I can do to pay them back.  Your business reputation does, after all, rely on the goodwill and referral of others.

If you haven’t considered this form of doing business, I recommend you join a professional networking group where the kinds of trades that would interest you exist within that group’s members. Then take it slowly, adding one trade client at a time and making friends as you go. You might just see how this ancient form of doing business can favorably affect your bottom line.

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A postscript:  Be sure you are comfortable with the “shades of grey” (no, not THAT kind..)  barter can introduce into your life and be up-front with your trade partner on the legalities.  In the U.S., the gross amount of a barter exchange’s sales is considered taxable revenue by the Internal Revenue 

If you are one of those people who has spent the past several years setting yourself up in your own proprietary business, you have no doubt done so at great potential risk –- to your psyche, your pocketbook and your future.  Getting yourself to the point where you finally rejected the notion of dancing to someone else’s tune, however, means having convinced yourself that going it alone was the only way you might at last reach the goal of loving your own life.

Once we get to that joyous point of work-becoming-play, as well as conjuring up the faith in our abilities to make a livelihood out of the gifts we knew lay hidden in us, however, we still grapple with the best use of our time. And many of us (including yours truly) feel as if we are out there in a netherworld of arranging meetings and accepting any paying gigs while constantly re-posturing our stances on what is acceptable and what is not in the course of doing business.

I will use myself as an example.  As a freelance writer, I am constantly looking for my next writing assignment. These assignments come in many forms, keeping my life immensely interesting.  One day I might be creating a professional bio for small business owner.  On another, I am writing a blog for a consultant who just can’t seem to be able to express the benefits of the services he or she offers.  Perhaps a medium-sized business needs an occasional press release to tout its relocation to a new facility.  And even more mind-blowing can be using my talents to help a large corporation fill out an application to win a prestigious award – simply because their own employees are too darned left-brained to tell a company story in an engaging way.

When I am firing on all burners, life is indeed exciting.  I am either hunkered down at my iMac or out there addressing business groups on the importance of creating and fostering their online presence, reaping the rewards of sharing my expertise with others with the payback of having built some (hopefully) solid credibility.    Writing occupies my mind constantly. Ideas and phrases swirl in my head as I fuzzily awake in the morning and continue until the remaining nagging ruminations of the day keep me from falling asleep for the first hour my head hits the pillow at night.

But there always comes a time when assignments trickle off the radar screen and few are to be seen on the horizon.  Plausible deniability notwithstanding, as independent business owners we all have these feast-or-famine periods.  How do we handle them?  Do we jump at anything that comes our way, lowering our fees or even our standards a bit in order to maintain our Starbuck’s habit?  Or do we simply put our heads down and use these periods of time to market our talents to the outside world while taking some much-needed rest to prepare for the onslaught that will inevitably ensue from  those efforts?

In his amusing but thought-provoking pandodaily.com blog, The Ultimate Productivity Tool, writer Francisco Dao admits, “Yes, I understand my business is more flexible than most, but for the longest time I still didn’t understand why everyone else was so busy.  Then about a year ago I was talking to a friend of mine who was complaining about some awful lunch meeting that she had to attend and I asked her, ‘Why the f—- would you agree to that meeting?’  As we kept talking about her busy schedule, I found myself asking her again and again, ‘Why the f— would you do that?’  Until finally it dawned on me that you could streamline your entire life by asking that question before you do anything.  It was the ultimate productivity tool.”

Too often we fail to question why we accept an invitation to meet with someone for coffee or lunch, not thinking through the possible result of the meeting nor even having a goal in mind for it. Even though we can rationalize that there is a “what’s-in-it-for-me” imbedded in any aspect of doing business, how often do we stop to ask that question of all that we do?

Oh, we can always rationalize those tasks we call “duties.”  But as Dao says, “But if you’re honest and really make an effort to some up with legitimate answers, I think you’ll find that asking the question clears away a significant amount of clutter and noise.”

He goes on to suggest how you might even find taking a daily nap more productive in the long run than doing things that bring little to no return, turning even a four-hour work week into something greater than any 60-hour one could produce in the big scheme of things.

As we continue along this roller coaster we call life, one thing is certain.  We will pass this way but once and what we do with it, whether or not others deem it productive, is in our hands.  And while we must consistently self-market in order to afford to maintain the data plans on our smart phones, it’s important not to beat ourselves up when those down days come along.  Having the kind of balance, self-confidence and energy we need for life’s inevitable craziness is – simply — golden.

What others think of you is no small part of doing business. It’s everything.  Especially for small business people, social media sites like Yelp, Facebook and Linkedin are set up primarily to explain and highlight YOU, your experience, and your philosophy for doing business.

As a professional copywriter, one of the first things I look for when writing about a client for marketing purposes is a list of their professional endorsements.  Taking their cue from yesteryear’s hard-copy “letters of recommendation,” today’s endorsements are merely a few sentences or short paragraphs referred to as “third party testimonials.”  These glowing words of praise can become key to getting people a sense of what someone else who has been there and done that has to say about you.

While the most convincing testimonials are unsolicited, adding a tab to your web site reserved for nothing but testimonials and endorsements from ANY source not only makes your site more user-friendly and can result in more business through search engine placement as well. Locations for these mini-testimonials are not restricted only to a page of your web site, however.  For example, many websites have contact forms visitors fill out and submit. A credible. well-written testimonial placed next to the contact form can be just the extra little incentive a visitor needs to take the desired action.  Low quality testimonials are those with no names attached or those with no traceable identities and locations listed – like “Robert C.”.

You can even take testimonials to the next level by interviewing your clients and posting either a written transcript or a video of their success stories on your website. Success stories are really just amplified testimonials, similar to case studies, but reflecting only the good stuff.

According to Lee Polevoi in Intuit.com’ s article, What’s Your Business G-Cred?, “If you’re a consultant or heading a small consulting business, it’s no longer enough to have a web presence.”  Polevoi goes on to explain that as a small business person you must establish your  G-cred – your “Google credibility” —  the information (links, images, and other data) about you people receive when they search Google for their names, businesses, products, or organizations, providing a measure of legitimacy and influencing how seriously potential clients, vendors, and employees take you. This includes numerous, enthusiastic professional recommendations as well as a thriving blog relating to your professional skills to boost your G-cred.

Getting started is easier than you might think.  Linkedin is one of the best places to begin. On your Linkedin profile page, there is a link that permits you to ask selected LinkedIn connections to endorse you.  If you’d rather not use their canned, pre-worded request, think up one of your own, such as,   “To enhance my LinkedIn profile as well as elsewhere for my business profile, I am contacting clients and friends who have used my services in the past to endorse me by writing a few lines about their (hopefully positive) experiences.  I appreciate your input and will gladly return the favor should you wish the same.”

If you do hire a copywriter, he or she can conduct phone interviews to get these important tidbits of praise. It’s a numbers game. Whether you get help or not, you won’t get responses from all of them all, since most people are time-zapped, hate to write or simply don’t know what to write. But you’ll get some, and you can copy and use those same testimonials on your web site, on your Facebook business page, on profile pages for networking organizations you belong to and even weave them into your professional bio.

The key is not to worry about offending or inconveniencing people by asking.  Testimonials are used all the time by large companies – on TV commercials, in print ads, and even by political candidates.  These corporate giants care  little about imposing on people when they ask for these endorsements, so why should you?  People are actually pleased you would ask and in many cases, feel flattered by it.

Prepare yourself for how great it will feel once you begin this process, though.  Once the endorsements come rolling in, you may find yourself gushing like Sally Field during her acceptance speech at an old Academy Awards presentation. “You like me!  You really like me!”

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An author, columnist and freelance writer since 1997, Dena Kouremetis creates blogs, newsletters, web site content, business bios, company profiles and all manner of content and copywriting help to the small-to-medium-sized business owner.  Feel free to visit her web site at communic8or.com.